It's Been Awhile

It has been awhile since I have written. It has been nice to be back home in Tokyo, but taken awhile to get back into the groove of things and come up with a routine. With two small boys the routine isn't always set as well as I would like either. My boys do keep me busy. I am not sure how people deal with multiple small children. I do not do well.

Justin continues to make me smile and laugh while testing my patience at the same time. He has tried kicking me out of the house in the morning by commanding, "Mommy go work, Daddy sit on floor play!" Little does he know that there are days Mommy would like to leave and go to work (or go anywhere). Now that my mom has gone home and isn't here to help with the boys I don't even get to go to the bathroom by myself very often. Can't leave my boys alone together or who knows what would happen. Justin has a love/hate relationship with Ryan. When he is jealous he gets a bit rough intentionally. Other times he just loves him to death with too tight hugs, overly enthusiastic tickles and pats, or by sharing toys--especially stuffed animals on the face. He seems to enjoy waking the sleeping baby and then complaining about the crying. Sigh! Tiny, bless his heart, is pretty good natured. Now that he is more alert and smiles, coos, kicks, and reaches for things, Justin is more interested in him. That is good and bad. Tiny is definitely more interested in Justin. Whether he just likes watching his brother's antics or watches in dread and fear is anyone's guess. He has such cute smiles and laughs. He has expressive eyes too. Even Rob has noticed and mentioned it a few times. There are times when Ryan looks and me and we just connect with each other.

Justin has a doll named Bobby. I tried catching him being gentle and loving with Bobby, but as soon as the camera came out, Justin started beating the poor thing. Guess he doesn't want me to think I can expect him to be sweet with Ryan.

Ryan loves having a blanket on his head. If he had his way it would cover his face completely. I think he is going to be a sleeper who needs a blanket. The SIDS police will probably come and take me away. I don't mean to make light of SIDS and feel for people who have lost a child to SIDS, but I am getting really tired of hearing all the contributers. Pacifiers reduce the risk. Being premature increases the risk. Blankets increase the risk. Sleeping on stomach increases the risk. Increased altitude increases the risk. Co-sleeping increases the risk. The list goes on and on. I wonder how they know this. Is it antedotal? Could it be that babies with blankets or those who sleep on their stomach actually sleep without being held and therefore are more at risk? If a baby is constantly held by an awake and alert individual, wouldn't that be the best way to prevent it? There are just too many rules for me! I know, sleeping in the swing is bad too.

Justin and the concept of time out are getting to know each other pretty well. Justin generally hates time out, but he does like playing time out. He will plop his body on the time out bench and say, "Time out 2 minutes, 3 minutes, 4 minutes, 5 minutes..." He often chooses 18 minutes. Eighteen is still his favorite number for some reason. After giving himself a time out, he laughs. He says, "ha ha ha," just like that by saying it instead of actual laughing. He will call my name repeatedly and make sure to get my attention before he refuses to comply with his own time out. Sometimes I admit I am tempted to enforce them. :)

Ryan is often in Justin's thoughts. The other night when Rob asked Justin if he wanted to say the prayer Justin said that he did. Rob asked Justin who he wanted to help him. Justin paused for a minute and then shouted out, "I want Tiny Baby help!" He was rather pleased that he came up with this. From now on we will be more specific with his options.

Two Kids Almost TOO Many!

So far Ryan has been an easier baby than Justin was. I will keep my fingers crossed that he keeps it up. Of course some of it may be me. My mom agrees that Justin was harder and we can't figure out why it took two of us to care for Baby Justin and we were STILL constantly worn out and sleep deprived. Now Ryan gets held a lot, I admit. (Though Justin was held constantly or he screamed.) I am afraid Ryan will start screaming when he isn't being held. The problems with putting him down are (1) Justin is likely to hurt him intentionally or accidently. His "help" is often anything but helpful! (2) If I put Ryan down and he cries when Justin is asleep or otherwise entertaining himself it gets Justin all worked up. I do NOT want Justin getting up for the day at 3:00 AM because he hears his brother. WE will see how and if things change when we get to Japan. I am bitter that the boys will have to share a room. That is not at all ideal. Justin is an interesting sleeper. Sigh.

Ryan sleeps with me at night. I don't know if that is good or bad. I know everyone has opinions. Do you know what? I don't care! I cared when Justin was little and Justin ended up with me a lot but I felt guilty about it. Yes, at some point I want Ryan in a crib and that will likely be a pain, but for now this is working well for us. He sleeps longer at a time with me (and thus I get more sleep) and he doesn't cry so Justin doesn't wake up. I am trying to enjoy my tiny baby. He is growing up so fast and there will be no more babies for me. Pregnancy is the worst!

Justin is a jealous one and needs to take the few toys Ryan has away from him. Justin constantly insists on "tummy time" with Ryan's toys. He wants to help and tries so hard to be gentle. He will touch him so nicely with one hand while leaning on Ryan with his other hand. Yeah, 30 pounds is too much to rest on your brother. At least Ryan is a sturdy baby at over 11 pounds already. He will be 6 weeks old on Wednesday. I can't believe how fast the time has gone.

Congratulations to all of you who manage more than two. Two take up my time! I had a 20 minute stand off with Justin today while Ryan had to cry on his own. I told Justin to put back the (three) boots he had thrown from the laundry room into the kitchen. He refused. He would agree to complete the task at the end of 2 minute time outs, and then would laugh and not do it. FINALLY he did it. He kicked each boot into the laundry room so it was just barely in the room. He did it though. He is as stubborn as his mom. It is going to be a long year in the terrible twos and probably a long 16 more years.